The Padres Have Started The Best Tradition In the History of Baseball...Drenching The Token Hot Sideline Reporter With A Gatorade Shower After A Win

So this is like the Padres new thing. They started it Wednesday. Then they continued it this weekend.  Imagine if I did this? Grabbed a chick against her will and drenched her in Gatorade after I wrote an awesome blog? The feminists would have me chained up Braveheart style in a jail somewhere cutting shit into my dick. Like this is more rape culturey than anything I’ve ever done. Don’t get me wrong I love it, but I just don’t get how the feminists haven’t torn down PetCo Park yet. They must not watch baseball.

Either way this needs to happen to Boom Boom every game. Only take it up a notch. Once she gets soaked start blaring Pour Some Sugar On Me over the PA as Dell grinds all over Pesky’s Poul. Boom done. Ratings bonanza. Nobody would ever turn the channel early. I can’t believe the Bandit hasn’t tried this already.

Kelly Crull